Summer Fun & Fees! June 26, 2011

Of course summer is here and though depending on where you live kids get out of school different times; southern states late May, northern states late June.  So right about now (close to) all the kids are out of school. As the single working mother finding things for your child / children to do all summer can be very expensive.  As a single parent summer camp fees for me was laughable, overnight or just during the day. A while back I checked into the cost of the YMCA. I was shocked to find how expensive the membership fees are now.  As a young girl I remember that being an inexpensive option for lower income children. Well not anymore. I thought that was pretty sad. As a single parent I just couldn’t afford a membership that literally cost hundreds to start and then a monthly fee to continue!!

So I just wanted to send a quick post to remind parents to remember the old favorites of public parks and some of the perks the parks may offer. Some of the parks in my local area offer plays and movies on certain days. Some have pools that are open during certain times. Of course I suggest you attend with your child regardless of his or her age. Public library’s can offer various activities as well and are free, like puppet shows and story telling, depending on the age of your children. And of course in my house I keep alive the use of old school board games, playing cards, and movie nights …things that don’t cost a dime but offer great time together and great memories. I would also encourage parents (depending on neighborhoods) to encourage your children to get outside and play. Something I grew up with that we just don’t see enough of anymore. Think of things that are right in your neighborhood that may not be as expensive. Most counties/areas have a website that will give you information on local events, which a lot of times are not a pricey as others.

Well I hope you and your children have an amazing summer filled with fun, a lot of laughter and great memories..together.

Of course I will continue to bring you thought and relevant tips that prayfully are helpful : )

 

Don’t forget you purchase the Mom’s With Deadbeat Dads Booklet for listed resources to help save money!

All Lessons Old & New Start With You June 16, 2011

As single mothers there are so many challenges we face. So many obscales to either defeat or romove. And all the while remaining intact, functioning, seemingly uneffected and always pleasantly ready for the next day. If we’ve done our job correctly if our beautiful children are none the wiser of these challenges.

It is so crucially important that children stay just that…children. That begins with us. Our choices in men, their fathers, was just that…our choices. We now have to put on our big girl panties and brave the new days of life without that individual (some deadbeats) and make the best of a situation we, at minimum, co-signed.  I say this to say, that in most cases the only true victim (100%) is the children. And that is where the focus should always stay. Now I am not saying that we as woman don’t get a really bad deal. Believe me I did. But I chose my pathetic ex-husband and I have to now live with that bad choice. Like every other bad choice we make in life, but my children didn’t choose their father. I may have been victimized (even just emotionally) in some ways but I won’t play the victim. I will own my mistakes, my choices (good and bad). I will review those choices and learn from them, especially the bad ones, with the intention to make better ones in the future.

Who we are, what we become, who our children see, what they see in us, determines (or at minimum effects) who they become. I sometimes don’t think mothers understand just how powerful a role we play in our children lives. We are literally molding innocent little humans. They are so frail and fragile. I use the analogy of creating (molding) pottery; when children are young its like when you first start molding pottery you can form the pottery any way you choose, but once its set (matured) you can’t bend or mold it…once a child is older you can’t undo or redo what we should have taught or un-teach things we shouldn’t have taught. So its crucial to be alert to the type of messages we are sending our little ones now, even the unconscious messages and lessons. Sometimes those are the loudest.

Just keep in mind all lessons old and new start with you.